Elohim Shama- The God Who Hears
I remember the first time I truly felt that I was ignored; as if the entire world heard me screaming and yet they closed their ears off to my pleas. I believed that if I cried someone would respond, if I screamed someone would run and save me, if I was falling someone would catch me. In my naivety I was hit hard and hit VERY hard when I experienced betrayal by the person most dear to my heart. I experienced the pain of wanting to be heard but no one cared to listen.
I still recall going through the throngs of betrayal, rejection and abandonment during my marriage. I remember when my husband walked away from me to be with another woman. I remember crying and wailing in distress to anyone who would listen and I remember feeling so shocked when not one person cared to hear my side of the story.
My character was slandered viciously and lies were attached to my name by the man I trusted the most. I just wanted to be understood because isn’t that what we all desire? To be heard, validated, and affirmed? I wanted to defend myself against the lies and to share my version of what really transpired during the divorce.
I desired for everyone to hear how distraught I was and how broken my husband made me feel. I needed everyone to see the narcissistic abuse I was going through; how I was manipulated and gaslighted for years to then be triangulated and discarded. To put it simply, I wanted justice.
In my journey of seeking justice I learned I was going about it in all the wrong ways. The only person who truly heard me, knew the full story and understood was God. He allowed me to cry my heart out in all of my distress and pain without judgement. It was in those quiet moments where I would come home from work, fall to the floor on my little rug and cry my eyes out that I encountered God.
During that time in 2019 I didn’t have a relationship with God and was not living a surrendered life. I knew God was real because of my Christian upbringing as a child; I learned his word and knew of him but did not know him. I didn’t know that when I cried because of the harsh betrayal that he also was crying. I didn’t understand that when I was depressed because of the abuse that he was also distraught. I had no idea that God cared about me and truly heard me when I called out to him. It was all so new for me and I had no understanding of how to pray.
My form of prayer and communication to him during this time was with tears; a broken spirit and a contrite heart Psalm 51:17. I would say “God Help Me” repeatedly because the pain was so unbearable. Little did I know that all of those tears, whispers and heartache was the beginning of my surrender.
What Does God Do With Our Prayers?
I believe that God stores the tears that we cry into bottles and holds it dear to his heart. He listens to our words and writes it on the tablet of his heart. I believe that every word we speak and every utterance we evoke no matter how trivial reaches his ears and not only does it reach his ears but he responds.
That is what relationship with God is all about. It is a reciprocal relationship where we speak and he listens and he speaks and we listen. It is a harmonious relationship between a Father and his precious child and that is what you are, Gods child.
As he hears, you will find rest knowing that only he can remove all of your burdens, struggles, worries and fears. Only he can redeem your story, vindicate and restore you. Only he can bring you the justice you so rightfully deserve in his righteous judgment. There is no prayer that is unheard, there is no cry that is ignored so cry out, reach out to the hem of his garment and call out to him for he is Elohim Shama- The God Who Hears.
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